pirate ship captain hellfire




Ahaaa! Ya found me here down below decks! Aye, you'll be glad ya did to be

sure! Ole Billy's always got a good tale to tell, and ain't that the truth o' it!

Now there be a bit o' a rumor goin' around this here vessel, suggesting that ya might be strugglin'

a little when it comes to making your lusty dreams of wanton all-night carousing with the apple of

your eye turn into a filth filled reality....

But fear not me hearties! If anyone knows how to get down to business rattling the bones it be yours truly!

Now the secret of a good pick up line be in your ability to gauge the temperament and general rum-addled nature of the intended recipient, and then decide if ye think it be prudent to fly all sails ahead. That ascertained, begin by flashing a sly, toothy grin (as seen in the picture above) and then it be time to make use of that scurvy soaked tongue of yours and get down to some serious wooing! 

Below be the Top 10 best pick-up lines for saucy strumpets and bawdy buccaneers! 

For the pirates

(to easily pry the bloomers off ye tavern wench)  

1:  Ahoy me maiden! How would you like me to drop me anchor in your sheltered cove? 

2: Aye! Well blow me down?

3: So me lassie, how about I make like a ships-mate and swab yer poop-deck?

4: So how'd you like to scrape the barnacles off me rudder?

5: Well I must be in the mood for treasure hunting, because I sure be diggin' your chest...

6: So is there an "x" on the seat o' yer bloomers? 'Cos there looks to be wonderous booty buried beneath! 

7: Beggin' yer pardon madam, but would you mind if I fired me cannon through yer porthole?

8: Aye me maid, would ya care to walk me plank?

9: So, would you like if I sunk me vessel in your briny deep?

10: Avast me lovely! Strike yer panties and prepare to be boarded!

For the wenches

(to raise the mast of any blue-blooded buccaneer)


​1: Come along now lad and show me how you bury your treasure...

2: So is that a belaying pin in yer britches or are you just happy to see me?

3: So tell me, why do they call you Long John?

4: Well I'm lice free but I've still got an itch I can't seem to scratch...

5: So they say I know how to handle a cutlass...

6: So how'd you like to haul me over and careen for a few days?

7: Well you best be getting yer swab out, cos it's getting a bit moist below decks...

8: I bet I know how to raise your jolly roger....

9: So how about you tie me to the deck and haul my keel?

10: Aye me sailor bold, how about I shiver yer timber?

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